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DON’T DO IT!

Frozen chicken closeup

Okay. I’m not holding anything back. Here’s the deal.

All advice is not worth taking. Seriously. Trust me on this one. Don’t do it!

 

What spurred this proclamation? The incident at the grocery store when I went to redeem my free 20 pound frozen turkey.  The following conversation ensued in the checkout line.

 

Clerk: Leave the bird on the counter for four days to thaw.

Me: 4 hours or 4 days?

Clerk: 4 days

Me: Are you serious?

Clerk: Yeah, that’s a big bird; it will take four days.

 

Sometimes I can’t resist in helping people to think their way through the process.

Warning: I’m not always successful.

All advice is not worth taking. Seriously. Trust me on this one. Don’t do it!

Me: What part do you think will thaw first?

Clerk: I would say the head, but I don’t think there is one, so the outside…in about a day.

Me: When will the inside thaw?

Clerk: On day four.

Me: What happens to the thawed part from day one?

Clerk: It just hangs out waiting for the rest to thaw.

Me: What temperature is the outside of the bird?

Clerk: I don’t know. Warm?

 

Pause, pause.

 

Me: Would you leave raw hamburger on the counter for four days?

Clerk: No way; it would spoil?

 

I saw a glimmer of hope.

Pause, pause. Hoping that a connection was being made with the turkey.

No connection.

 

Me: What keeps the turkey from spoiling?

Colonel Janice A. Howard is the USA Eastern Territorial Secretary for Spiritual Life Development

Colonel Janice A. Howard is the USA Eastern Territorial Secretary for Spiritual Life Development

Clerk: Everybody knows that – cooking it on day four or five!

Me: Where did you get these instructions?

Clerk: From my dead uncle.

Laughter from two customers behind me.

 

Customer: I bet he died of food poisoning!

Hum…

 

Trust me: don’t thaw your frozen turkey on the kitchen counter for four days.

Don’t take counsel from everyone; it’s not always good counsel. Don’t do it!

All counsel is not beneficial, helpful, or SAFE! Use wisdom in making your choices.

 

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